The Ultimate Newbie Guide to Thailand

Advice from the Seasoned Travelers 

In a survey seasoned travelers and expats were asked each to give just only one advice to newbies traveling to Thailand. Below is a compilation of the advice given.
They are listed in no particular order and of cause subject to individual travelers view and preferences.
Note: Comments in italic have been added by the editor of this site.

Keep Your Cool. As a Thai would say: "Jai yen" meaning cool heart.
If a tense situation arise, better exit with a bow and a smile ... sometimes even offer compensation when it may not be due.

Dual Pricing. Don't fret the double pricing, residents pay less many times, you can say no if its too much money for something

Freebies aren't worth the hassle, pay as you go is the way to go

Keep it fun

Don't sweat the small stuff

Don't believe a word the girls tell you, screw and forget

Always, always, always, be aware of your surroundings ... sometimes difficult after 15 drinks

Don't be an jerk. Smile, and go with the flow. At the first sign of trouble just walk away.

If you do not have or cannot afford Travel Insurance do not come. Also pay the extra to cover you when riding a scooter (including motorbike taxi).
Note: Some 'home' insurance plans may cover you ... check before the trip

Find a place like Secrets Bar or another bar with regular Expats, introduce yourself and LISTEN, and you'll learn an awful lot.

Do not EVER send money

Don't be quick to judge. Watch, learn, listen and implement.

Don't have the attitude that every girl is for hire

Read "Private Dancer" before you go. There's enough in there to give you a good start.
Note: While often quite accurate, this book is fictional.

Take your watch off when you land, and don't spend ANY time doing something where you are not having fun doing. Of course keeping within the law.

SLEEP when you get home

Follow the 3 day rule
Note: Meaning don't hire the same girl for more than 3 days.

Manners go a long way

Never make plans in LOS

Don't have a 'hit list' based on pics seen on a forum, as she probably will be elsewhere for whatever reason. OK to have a light hearted wish list thoug

Someone mentions drugs -- walk on! Don't think you can be cool .... just walk on ...

You don't know the language and you don't know the culture
if you cannot say something with a smile, better to keep your mouth shut.

Remember its your holiday and its your money don't let the girls take control

Don't try to Wai, you will look daft. Acknowledge the Wai with a smile and a nod of the head

Do not fall in love

Don't make any life changing decisions whatever they may be whilst under the influence of a BG

Don't run out of money. Have access to a known amount and budget accordingly.

Always take a shower before you go out. Wear clean clothes. Carry a pack of gum with you to keep your breath fresh. Personal hygiene is important to the girls.

Always use a condom for vaginal/anal intercourse

When out and about and having fun, always divide your money in two places. Don't carry it all in one pocket.

Don't carry your passport with you unless needed. Don't leave your it as security for anything especially any rental. Just carry a copy (along with a business card from the hotel or guesthouse)

Never take a new girl on the last night of your holiday.

Don't tell her it's your last night...

Don't be afraid to negotiate, it is business after all.

Save yourself the trouble of requests for money after returning home by making it a practice not to give out email addresses and to throw away the local SIM card when leaving Thailand.

Just smile, always be polite, and never aggressive. You will be fine.

Don't embarrass anyone, don't humiliate, always be ready to smile and walk away and be glad you did.

When walking - ALWAYS be aware in all directions and expect the unexpected. It's a completely different traffic environment than what most are accustomed.

Don't assume that fart, is just going to be your average, everyday fart

Note: Germs and bacteria is different from home and you will notice the change. See Diet & Food Safety.

If the girl has a deeper voice than you, walk away smiling.

Note: See also Spotting Ladyboys or Katoeys

Leave your expensive jewelries and watches etc. at home. The will not impress anyone over here, rather can they make you at target at some stage.

Settle the price before you take her out of the bar and don't pay her until the time is up or you want her to leave.


The Ultimate Newbie
Guide to Thailand